My husband does not have a filter. This is a collection of selected quotes from his daily rantings. Some can be offensive and include harsh language.. if you are sensitive to these, please refrain from reading.
Me: “eat this, or it’s going in the garbage.”
Hubby: “you’re going in the garbage!”
Me: “excuse me?”
Hubby: “yeah, I didn’t think that through”
Me: (watching a Raiders game) “Are they playing on a baseball field?”
Husband: (diaspointed) ”Damnit, Oakland.”
“Claire Daines is an obnoxious bitch. She was like, ‘oh, I remember when I won a Golden Globe and I was like, oh, cool.’.. you know what Claire, I was glad you died in Little Women.”
“ugh, Mila, your boobs. They’re Denny’s pancakes… and that’s the worst kind of pancake.”
“I mean, what am I going to do when you divorce me? This tattoo of your name on my neck won’t remove itself.”
